New York (AP)- In a surprise announcement, Blog services firm BlogStat Media has
decided to suspend all anonymous commenting operations. Spokesperson and chief
technologist Ray K. Gomez said in a telephone news conference Thursday that the
firm will cease all further blog related postings effective immediately. Mr.Gomez
cited decreased interest in the firms premium “High content” remarks, and the
blog reading publics desire for limited general “MOR” comments, dead links and
“smileycons”. “Our internal surveys suggests that some of our more complex
comments such as those featured on K.Tofts blog, have induced physical and mental
exaustion in many consumers which has led to vertigo, perplexed looks and a
generalized anxiety which engenders a certain hostility towards the product and
the firm.” Mr.Gomez further suggested the firms comments may have had other
untoward effects. “There seems to be some empirical evidence that certain of our
developers output has had a “chilling” effect on the primary author. This
chilling effect has manifested as a decreased frequency of postings and in some
cases a complete cessation and even abandonment of the blog site.” Gomez added
“We serve at the behest and pleasure of the individual blogger and despite our
respective interests they remain mutual and not mutually exclusive, Thank you
very much.” There have been industry rumours that the firm may offer anonymous
commenting services at ’some point’ on a “fee basis”.

AP. As the big holiday preweekend waned so did the hopes for a big holiday
hit fest on blog darling Katie “KT” Tofts cute “blog in a blog” blog.
Miss Toft is the star player for the struggling “A bunch of us” blog site which
is a loose confederation of mediocre bloggers,most
notable for ingesting, disseminating and repeating a lot of kooky fringe
gossip, so five minutes ago trends, old man sports, and endless vapid
ego massaging. Despite all the hoopla, and brazen self promotion, the so
titled “My lesbian sister is a hot model” entry failed to generate the
hoped for mega hits and languished in the mid double digits thru most of
the busy weekend leading up to summers last stand. “This is very
disturbing to us. We are very concerned that Ms.Tofts poor showing may
be and indicator for ‘blogslog’ across the panoply of blogs that make up
this thing we call the “blog ‘o’ sphere”.
So said Raymond Kramer Gomez. Mr. Kramer Gomez is chief analyst for
Blogstat.com which secretly monitors, comments on, and collects metric
data from a select group of blogs. “But what is most alarming is that we
have these soft numbers despite the busy holiday with its presumed
attendant viewership and Ms.Tofts recent turn towards making her blog
more “adult oriented”. In recent weeks in what appears to be a grab for
more hits, which in the blog world translate into ratings, the baby
faced Ms. Toft has submitted a number of posts with salacious titles and
dubious subject matter.”from our viewpoint it seems a bit desperate but
of late Ms. Toft seems to be all about desperation, and debauchery. it
is regrettable.” Kramer Gomez may have been referring to the usually
demure Ms. Tofts recent misadventure in do it yourself image makeovers by
posing for suggestive photos with gay guys. The most notable of these
being the notorious “tongue” photo in which Ms.Toft unashamedly displays
and impressive rock star like tongue while leering at a child’s pink
popsicle with two gay guys and their popsicles. “That photo generated a
lot of heat and excitement among readers, believe you me. we have lots
of data that shows a huge spike in readership and lots of other places
as a result of that photo” Kramer Gomez said a little sheepishly. when
questioned further Kramer Gomez said “that data is provided to our
subscribers and others for a price” Mr. Kramer Gomez did sheepishly allow
that ‘at least one user downloaded that photo “multiple” times.” If that
photo is visual proof of Ms. Tofts desire to leave behind the safe G
rated Disneyland she has ruled over, it certainly doesn’t seem she’s
going to content herself or her readers by stopping at a PG Spiceworld.
In fact, Ms. Toft gave her readers some insight into her secret world
sometime earlier this year and it seems a lot more xx. In a disturbing
thumbing of her cute button nose at every institution known to man, Ms
Toft gleefully recounted a typical weekend for her which consisted of
numerous out of wedlock anonymous sexual encounters, binge
drinking, cursing, blasphemy, shoot the works gambling, gluttony and
oddly, lawn mowing. Then why is Ms Tofts seamy new brand of sleaze not
selling? “She’s a big with a capital big Tease” says the sheepish Kramer Gomez in
and exasperated near yell, “She’s all sizzle and no steak” She’s
playing a game here with her readers”. Mr.Kramer Gomez cites the current
and disappointing “My lesbian sister is a hot model” entry. “there was a
lot of excitement and anticipation surrounding MLSIAHM,a lot provided by
Toft herself. everybody’s hot for lesbian action and hot models whatever.
But what did we get? some kakafka who do I look like photo mess with
some boohoo sob girl rant about I’m so horrible and nobody loves me sob boohoo.
We’ve seen this ploy many times from Ms.Toft it’s a fishing expedition, but this is
the first time she’s sunk to using the L word.” Mr. Kramer Gomez
half of whom is from a foriegn country reiterated in a somewhat
sheepish half sob ‘A tease, a damn big tease. she makes a lot of
promises and gets everybody all hot and bothered and then it’s like she
slaps your hand. there’s a lot of readers who are getting frustrated
with Toftie and her act, she’s causing a lot of discomfort.” But not all blame
can be placed at the adorable Miss Tofts well worn revolving bedroom
doorstep. Much to the ire of readers, dreaded soviet style tactics have
been in evidence at the formerly free wheeling anything goes blog site.
One fan who wished to remain anonymous said “Most guys just want to go to
Tofties blog, read her entry, maybe make a comment and then they’re outta there,
bing,bang, boom, like that, but now you gotta be real careful” he refused further
elaboration. So what can a formerly hot property like Ms.Toft do, to prop up
her blog and possibly give a lift to her sagging members? According to
Mr. Kramer Gomez it’s not a matter of ‘put up or shut up’. It’s a little more complex
than that “It’s more like OK, Either put out and if you’re not gonna put out than
at least take your stupid top off for gods sake.”,he ended somewhat cryptically saying
“Shanice yes!”?