Cross post from my blog.

Several weeks ago I diligently called my dental office:
Me: Hi, I need to make an appointment. Do you have anything on Friday?

Receptionist: No. We don’t work Fridays.

Me: Oh…ok, what’s your last appointment of the day?

Receptionist: 3:15.

Me: That’s your LAST appointment? Huh…OK, I’ll need to take work off. What do you have this Thursday?

Receptionist: I can’t schedule in June yet because I don’t have my calender.

Me: Uh…it’s May 29th and you don’t have your calender for JUNE? That’s only in a few days.

Receptionist: I know. It’s my higher-ups. They haven’t given me my June calender so I can’t schedule you. Sorry.

Me: OH…I guess I’ll call back.

So, I called back in a week and got an appointment for 3:15 on Thursday. I arrived fifteen minutes early and decided to sit in my car, in the parking lot, and read a book. At 3:08 the receptionist opened the door and hollered, “Mara?!”

I was so startled I dropped the apple I had been eating (to get my teeth sqeaky clean). “Yeah?!” I yelled out my car window.

“They’re waiting for you!” She yelled looking exasperated.

“My appointment isn’t until 3:15,” I replied, noticing my clock read 3:08.

“No, it’s 3,” She said and went back inside.

I packed up my things and exited my car, pausing to look at my day planner: Dentist 3:15 (Leave work at 3). I felt annoyed. I sat down in the dentist chair and mentioned to the Hygienist that I had been told 3:15. “No one is mad at you,” the hygienist claimed, which I found to be a total lie. This woman was the most passive aggressive dental hygienist I’ve ever met. When she asked me if I wanted fluoride and I said no she said, “Well, you know, you were inquiring what you could do to avoid cavities, next time you get a chance, just swish a flouride based mouth wash around.” I decided to opt for the fluoride. My actual dentist isn’t bad, even though he pronounces my name “Mare-uh” which I HATE but haven’t bothered to correct him because, you know, I only see him every six months. It’s not like I see him every day. After he did his work (patched a little cavity and gave me a seal on a receding gum line), the hygienist plowed through my mouth like a woman who wanted to leave for the day.

After I diligently swished my flouride, the receptionist informed me she had a bunch of paperwork for me to fill out, “This is why we like to have people in a few minutes early.”

“Hey,” I said, wanting to lay it out, “My appointment was scheduled for 3:15.”

The receptionist lowered her voice, “I know, but the hygentist saw you sitting in your car and said, ’she’s just sitting in the parking lot eating an apple!’ so I said I would get you. When we say 3:15 we actually want you in the dentist’s chair at that exact time.”

“I did not know that,” I replied, making a mental note to never bother with this dental office again. “That’s good to know.”

“Are you leaving soon?” The hygientist asked. “You’re parked behind my car.”

So, dear readers: any Seattle/Renton dental recommendations? I feel like I’ve gone the random route before (read: conveniently located near home or work) and now I want to raise my standards. Word of mouth should be leading me to someone better, a little more flexible, without a hygienist who wants me out of the chair ASAP.