I don’t know why but I just want to take Britney home with me. Last night at the VMA’s I sat there watching her “big comeback” and thought, either she is completely drugged up and is afraid of falling over or she is terrified and out of practice. Either way, I can do a better job falling out of bed in the morning than she did lip syncing and awkwardly standing on stage. It’s unanimous, her “comeback” actually put her back a little further. It was painfully sad.

I think the best quote of the evening was when Sarah Silverman said it was amazing to think that at this age Britney “has already accomplished everything she is going to accomplish in her life.” This will be true if someone doesn’t wake her up. And that’s why I want to take her home. Educate her. Snap her out of this crap. Not that I think she has any talent, but she is a money-making commercial queen that only has to get her shit together, sound a little more intelligent, and pump out pop music to stay successful. For someone whose idol is Madonna, she sure isn’t catching on to the queen of pop’s brilliance and business sense.

The other sad bit though was that MTV was touting this amazing new format for the VMA’s and was promoting it like it was the new breakthrough of the decade. But in actuality it felt sloppy and commercial, gasp! What’s even more laughable is that they are a music industry, thereby specializing in audio and video, yes? So why did it seem every time you turned around the microphones weren’t on and the videos were hiccuping? Sick. My high school video yearbook was better produced.

Update: I figured out what they thought was their “new format.”  Much like TRL has ruined MTV by only showing bits of videos and then letting people scream “shout-outs” in the middle of the snippets, the VMA’s only showed clips of live perfomrances happening at multiple Vegas parties and then when the stage performances were going on, they would advertise and talk over them.  MTV has officially ruined every aspect of music and videos.  At least our very lovely and multi-talented Justin Timberlake (won the Quadruple Threat award) gave an acceptance speech that said something to the effect of “I’m calling out to MTV to play more videos!”