Ahoy, mates!

So, do tell:

Where’s the best place to live in Seattle? Which are the best schools (public or private (for the children under 18))? Is it really so very rainy or is that just an urban legend?

I have reason to believe this may be in my (relatively) distant future:

http://depts.washington.edu/bioe/programs/phd/phd.html

As of today, it’s exactly one year to the day since the Special Lady Friend and I arrived in Maine, fresh off our 4,300 mile odyssey, moving back from Seattle. (Although, if you want to be pedantic about it, this is a leap year, so technically yesterday was exactly 365 days. Luckily, I am not pedantic.)

It’s been an eventful year. Since setting up shop back on the East Siiiide, I’ve

• Gotten married
• Changed careers
• Reached the statistical halfway point of my expected lifespan
• Cheered for not one, but two championships by professional franchises from my general geographic area, which of course covers me in vicarious, unearned glory
• Been bitterly disappointed by a third. (Yes, I realize I’m ridiculously spoiled. It’s not as if anyone from, say, Seattle would have any pity for me at all)
• Posted treasonous, objectively pro-Elitislamohomoliberofascist insults of Dear Leader on no fewer than 19 occasions (ok, so maybe that’s not a big change)

After being away from my home state for the better part of a decade, I can say it’s changed quite a bit. I used to curse the place for being too conservative and claustrophobic, but an interesting thing happened while I was gone: Mainers have loosened up quite a bit. There’s state-run health insurance for the poor, every 8th grader gets a laptop, the Green Party has official standing, marijuana laws are fairly lax, and George W. Bush is staggeringly unpopular, even in Kennebunkport.

In fact, given its large size, low population density, large swathes of pristine wilderness, and odd mix of rednecks and hippies, Maine less resembles its urbanized, overpopulated Northeast neighbors than a large, Western state.

Except, of course, that here, the sun rises out of the ocean, instead of setting in it. As it should be.

There has recently been of rash of sexed-up marketing in the library world. A few weeks ago, Wyoming Libraries caused quite a stir in the profession (both pro and con) with their “Mud Flap Girl” marketing campaign. This week, two additional sexed-up marketing campaigns have been revealed by American Libraries magazine. First, a personal crusade by a youth services librarian in Bend, Oregon who skates for the the Lava City Roller Dolls team “12-Gauge Rage,” under the name “Dame Deviant.” She sports a sign on the backside of her uniform that reads, “Support Libraries.” Nicely Done! Next was a story about marketing the Penn State Altoona’s Eiche Library. The library staff decided to sponsor a booth at the school’s annual health fair. They wore wore bright blue, “Sex On Campus” T-Shirts, and gave away hundreds of condoms over the course of the event. It was such a successful community outreach project, that they intend to double the number of laptops they brought for next year because so many people wanted to take the interactive sex quiz that the librarians crafted. Rock On!

If you didn’t know, Flickr was recently banned in China because it could be used as a forum for free expression. There is, however, a workaround. Using Firefox and an add-on anyone in China, Iran, Saudi Arabia or any other government-suppressed country can use flickr too!

There is quite a long list of content banned by China. According to GreatFirewallOfChina.org, A.bunchof.us is one of the many blogs inaccesible to the Chinese (as it damn well should be.)

So if you know anyone in China who enjoys Flickr.. you should call them and let them know.

 Wikipedia has the story.

While I’m typically a fairly adaptable creature, I admit to feeling a bit like a fish out of water suddenly in my own country. There was a major upset in the Swedish government a couple of weeks ago. The Social Democrats lost power to the “Moderates” who plan to restructure the fabulously famous Swedish Welfare State. And I’m torn about it.

On one hand, it’s high time the abuse of the welfare state be reigned in. The Swedish economy, while still strong despite its unwillingness to join the Euro-currency, is headed for disaster if something isn’t done quick. Of course it won’t affect health care benefits; instead mostly unemployment benefits…while offering up a big push to attract international business.

On the other hand, I see the fatal flaw in succumbing to business–allowing multi-national corporations to pull the strings and create policy behind the scenes. One of my most favorite things about Sweden is that the “how” of government is very much in the public realm. Very few secret handshakes. That’s all set for big change.

And no one, no one, likes change. Change is hard. Painful. Heartbreaking.

I was eligible to vote. But I didn’t. I was going through some big changes myself. See, my country is no longer Sweden. I’ve repatriated. Back to the great PNW. I refuse, however, to let it all go. I’m keeping my residency permit current for as long as I can. Just in case. This country, now that I’m back, scares the hell out of me more than ever.

I got this from my friend.  He values his anonymity so I will say only that his name rhymes with “Yawn” and he is an attorney for SoulCrushing and SoulSmashing, Esquires At Law.  Now, for realsies this time, only ONE ANSWER PER PERSON.  There is more than enough to go around.  Don’t be the kid who raises their hand for every question.  Nobody likes that kid.  I’ll go first: Clockwork Orange.

I think you can find a larger version of the picture here, in case Wordpress resizes it in transit.

But something a little more sinister is afoot.

This is causing quite a stir here in Sweden. The fact that the Motion Picture Association of America has the influence to force the Swedish police shut down The Pirate Bay, a Swedish site. Yes, it was a pirate site. Yes, you could download software and other such stuff. Yes, everyone knows it’s wrong. Had a Swedish governmental authority cracked the whip would have been fine.

But the Motion Picture Association of America? Lording its power over a lone sleazy Swedish pirate site?

Can we say “outside reasonable jurisdiction?” Yes, the Swedes have very little backbone but giving away its power away to the US? Sickening.

Gaze, if you dare, deep into the face of Pure Evil:

Purity Balls. No, not some sort of newfangled spherical chastity device to be inserted using vacuum tubes and pulleys, but rather fancy creepy dress-up rituals taking place in towns like Colorado Springs and Tucson and Zoloft Jesusville, in which Christian dads rent a bad tux while their daughters, mostly teenagers but many as young as 6 or 7, get all dolled up in gowns from JCPenny and they all drive out to the airport Marriott and prepare to, well, lose their minds.

It begins. At some point the daughter stands up, her pale arms wrapped around her daddy, and reads aloud a formal pledge that she will remain forever pure and virginal and sex-free until she is handed over, by her dad (who is actually called the “high priest” of the home), like some sort of sad hymenic gift, to her husband, who will receive her like the sanitized and overprotected and libidinously inept servant she so very much is. Praise!

Would that I were making this up.

(snip)

Premarital sex is evil. Female sexuality must be, as ever, contained, repressed, shoved deep down lest it tempt men to sin like gleeful pagans licking ice cream from the pierced nipples of the devil. Girls do not know how to handle their own genitalia and therefore must be taught — by their fathers, no less — how to dilute their sexual power in order to attract a sexually unqualified, God-fearing husband. You know, same as it ever was.

Last month, I posted a list of my favorite new albums of 2006. In that post, I lamented my inability to link to an online review for Motorpsycho’s Black Hole/Blank Canvas. Since the album has not been released in the US, and might not be due to the band’s lack of an American distributor (I obtained my copy through a certain file-sharing network), I despaired of ever finding a review in English.

Finally, tired of waiting, I clicked on one of the many German-language reviews I found online, and decided to test out Google’s infamous “Translate this Page” feature. The mangled, computer-generated translation that spat out was chock full of individual nuggets of unintentional comedy gold. For example:

That is not called naturally under any circumstances quiet, instead the two let classical skirt cutlery speak and get a correct music steam roller from the garage, in addition, to calmer parts with mehrstimmigem singing the duo thought. Here the hut burns.

Insanity, as it breaks its neck with “in Our Tree”. Among them: Sound volume in perfection.

Dreamed and far “Sancho Says” floats in, in order to likewise screw itself into a kind intoxication, which remains clearly gentler however

That is not to mean however that the Motorpsychos can be mutated the second part of the album back-lean and to pure Shoegazern.

Hey, it makes at least as much sense as your average Pitchfork review.