Kuiper Sophie Smith was born on 1/13 weighing 7 lbs. 4 oz. and standing 20 inches tall. She’s perfect and we’re all on a babymoon.

And for inquiring minds and their wanting to know…

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuiper_belt

Creationists Defeated in Kansas:

School authorities in the American heartland state of Kansas have delivered a rebuff to subscribers to the notion of intelligent design by voting to banish language challenging evolution from new science guidelines.

Next stop, 20th century* or bust! Yeeeee haaaaa!!!!

I can’t help but think that, just perhaps, the Flying Spaghetti Monster had something to do with opening the public’s eyes on this topic. Praise to the FSM, and may we all be Touched by His Noodly Appendage.

Of course, lest we succumb to the comfortable illusion that blinkered, philistine ignorance about basic scientific principles and the desire to replace said principles with religious fairy tales is confined to the US, I invite you to read this.

(*Author’s note: We are currently residing in the 21st century. Baby steps, people.)

As some of you may know, my favorite movie is Groundhog Day. I am a member of the Bill Murray fan club. I took a trip to visit Punxsutawney, PA (my mecca??) and stayed at a B&B there. My personal philosophy of life is not based on this movie, but is, however, very much in sync with the message I get from this movie. I was raised without religion and think of my childhood belief system as being derived from Little House on the Prairie and I think my adult belief system may be from this movie….

I was surprised to learn a while back that I am not the only person to see more in this movie than a furry rodent and a sweet love story. Check this out for example: http://www.touchstonemag.com/docs/issues/17.3docs/17-03-012.html and this http://www.schindler.org/psacot/20010813_ghd.shtml and then if you are still intrigued, there’s this http://www.transparencynow.com/groundhog.htm. To me, the messages I take from the movie are pretty simple – be less selfish and do the work to make a beautiful life.

I went to see the comedian Jim Gaffigan last night. He’s hilarious and if you get the chance to see him, I totally recommend going. One of his bits is about how mad people get if you have not seen their favorite movie. I don’t think I have ever met someone who has not seen Groundhog Day. If you are one of those rare beasts who has not seen it, however, then Friday might be the perfect opportunity to rent it. (Oh, and wish Katie Toft a happy birthday on that day, too!)

As I have alluded to on a few occasions, the library where I work is in a school that serves homeless families and their children. The kids we work with have usually dealt with more trauma in their short lives than most of us can even comprehend (time spent living in shelters, parental substance problems, abusive fathers, battered mothers, language barriers, massive amounts of missed school time, lack of regular medical attention, etc, etc, etc.) Because of this, our school has trained counselor/therapists on staff to work with the kids and help them process and deal with their issues and trauma. These kids are psychologically wounded, and we jumpstart their healing process. It’s an integral part of what we do, at least as important as getting them caught up on the school time they’ve missed.

At least until now. Thanks to the federal government’s recent “reinterpretation” of the No Child Left Behind Act, we were forced to lay off one of our two full-time counselors on staff. Previously, government education funds could, in addition to traditional school expenses, materials, and teacher salaries, be used to pay other school staff such as counselors. But no more. The feds decided that funding for such “luxuries” as psychological therapy would only be allowed after the kids’ scores on standardized tests went up. And since all of our kids have, not surprisingly, missed tons of school time, their test scores are almost always below grade level.

So, to sum up: we can’t give the kids the counseling and therapy they desperately need to improve their school performance…until after their school performance improves.

President Bush and his party constantly proclaim, with great fervor and fanfare, their Christian faith. They invoke the name of God as motivation and/or justification for any number of policies. Hell, Bush even named Jesus Christ as his favorite philosopher. It’s times like this when I wonder whether or not any of these self-proclaimed Christians have ever bothered to read the words of the guy they’re so publicly chummy with.

I don’t believe in Heaven, Hell, or any kind of Afterlife. But sometimes, I really hope there is a Hell. Because if it does exist, ol’ Dubya and people like him have a nasty surprise in store when they die.

I really do think about things other than Project Runway and MySpace… and I promise a meaningful and intellectual post soon, but for now, have you seen What if God had a MySpace?

Posted on a MySpace bulletin:

1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn’t changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can’t marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britany Spears’ 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn’t be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren’t full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That’s why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That’s why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven’t adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life spans.

Gaze, if you dare, deep into the face of Pure Evil:

Purity Balls. No, not some sort of newfangled spherical chastity device to be inserted using vacuum tubes and pulleys, but rather fancy creepy dress-up rituals taking place in towns like Colorado Springs and Tucson and Zoloft Jesusville, in which Christian dads rent a bad tux while their daughters, mostly teenagers but many as young as 6 or 7, get all dolled up in gowns from JCPenny and they all drive out to the airport Marriott and prepare to, well, lose their minds.

It begins. At some point the daughter stands up, her pale arms wrapped around her daddy, and reads aloud a formal pledge that she will remain forever pure and virginal and sex-free until she is handed over, by her dad (who is actually called the “high priest” of the home), like some sort of sad hymenic gift, to her husband, who will receive her like the sanitized and overprotected and libidinously inept servant she so very much is. Praise!

Would that I were making this up.

(snip)

Premarital sex is evil. Female sexuality must be, as ever, contained, repressed, shoved deep down lest it tempt men to sin like gleeful pagans licking ice cream from the pierced nipples of the devil. Girls do not know how to handle their own genitalia and therefore must be taught — by their fathers, no less — how to dilute their sexual power in order to attract a sexually unqualified, God-fearing husband. You know, same as it ever was.

I’m looking your direction, KT

I’ve always wondered why Anti-Choice types are so dead-set against things like the pill, emergency contraception, etc… Wouldn’t widespread use of these things REDUCE the number of abortions? Isn’t that the point?

Sadly, they don’t really care about these babies (just look at how they treat most of these kids once they are actually born… no funding for health care, day care, etc, etc). Having a kid of my own now, I can’t imagine subjecting a baby to the terrble circumstances that can arise when a child isn’t wanted, loved or properly cared for. I’m all for adoption, but lets face it: Adoptive parents are picky, and a lot of kids don’t get decent homes.

So why don’t don’t these people want to use practical, realistic means to create a world with fewer abortions?

Because peon chicks shouldn’t be enjoying sex…

I realized after taking an assessment of how I spent my day that I was proud to see how far I have come from my Catholic upbringing.

Let’s take a look at all the ways I spent my Sunday aka God’s Day:

• Woke up beside a man I am not married to.
• Played in a poker tournament at a casino.
• Ate a bunch of swine (not against my original religion per say, but why not hit a few others in the process).
• Had a good roll in the hay in a premarital way.
• And enjoyed it (I’m sure that’s against the rules of most religious orders. No orgasms for the women.)
• Used protection.
• Texted with my gay friend who is married to another man who is on a trip with another gay male couple.
• Made myself a Manhattan
• Played some online poker
• Worked. Quite simply, got on my computer and worked. On a Sunday.
• And if I hadn’t already mowed my lawn yesterday, I’d be doing that too. Take that, Lynden!

Ah, life is good and I don’t regret a minute. Hedonism is the way of today.

If you are using your laptop computer and an unsecured wireless network appears and you use it to connect to the net, are you wrong? Are you bad? Unethical? Deserving of punishment?